Bullying
Physical
Someone who hurts your body and/or possessions.
Verbal
Having someone say or write mean things about you.
Social
Someone hurting your reputation or relationships you have with others.
Cyber or Electronic
Bullying using the Internet, cell phones, or other devices to send or post text or images intended to hurt or embarrass another person.
No matter what form it takes, bullying is wrong, and it is happening to you,
it hurts and you want it to stop.
Am I Being Bullied?
Maybe you’re not sure if you’re really being bullied or if you are just making a big deal out of nothing. Here are some indications that what you are experiencing is bullying:
Physical/Verbal Bullying
- Have you been repeatedly shoved or punched or had your belongings knocked out of your hands by the same person or group of kids?
- Have you been targeted by friends of someone who doesn’t like you, who hurt you on that person’s behalf?
- Has someone been spreading nasty rumors and lies about you or made fun of you in conversation or notes?
- Have you stopped going to certain places because you are afraid that you will be bullied?
Cyber Bullying
- Has someone hacked into your email/social media accounts and used it to send mean or inappropriate emails?
- Has someone spread lies or rumors about you via email/text/social media?
- Has someone posted unflattering or private pictures of you without your consent?
If you are being bullied, remember: you are not alone. Physical and cyber-bullying affect more than one-third of children and teens.
What Should I Do?
If you are being bullied, here are some ways you can get help and protect yourself and your friends from bullies.
No one deserves to be bullied.
Tell an Adult You Trust
Be prepared to tell them:
- What is happening to you
- Who is doing it
- Where it’s taking place
- How often it has occurred
- How it is making you feel
If you are afraid to talk about it, bring a friend with you for encouragement.
If you tell a grown-up but you are told to “stop complaining” or “don’t be a tattle tale,” then find another adult to talk to. Bullying is wrong and needs to be reported. In some states, bullying may also be a crime.
Electronic Bullying – Do Not Reply
Replying to a bully electronically may actually make the bullying worse.
- Tell a family member or another adult you trust.
- Save evidence of the bullying: take a screen shot, print it out or save it in some way as evidence.
- If possible, block any more communications from this person.
The bullying should also be reported to an Internet service provider or website moderator as well as to the police. In some states, cyberbullying can be a criminal offense.
Stay in a Group
Kids who bully like to pick on kids who are by themselves most of the time. Join clubs, sports teams or other activities in your school or community. Being with other kids will make you feel more confident and help build your social circle.
Stand Up for Yourself
Bullies don’t expect their victims to stand up for themselves. Sometimes, it can be as simple as saying, “Stop bothering me” and then going on with what you are doing.
- Stay calm. A bully wants to upset you. If you show that you are scared or upset, it only encourages that person to continue.
If you are afraid the bully will physically hurt you, do not confront them and get help.
Don’t keep it to yourself and just hope the bullying will “go away.” It won’t.
If Your Friend is Being Bullied
- Tell them that it’s not their fault. Be there for them as a friend and invite them to be part of school or social activities.
- Encourage them to tell a grownup what is happening. If they are too afraid to do it, then you report it.
- If your friends or classmates are bullying someone, tell them to stop.
- Don’t be part of a bullying activity because the bullies are “your friends.”
- Get together with other kids to form an anti-bullying group to raise awareness of the problem in your community or school.
If Your Child is Being Bullied
Listen to what your child is telling you and take complaints of bullying seriously.
If you suspect your child is being bullied, support your child, inform others and take action.
Pay attention to signs that your child is being bullied:
- Your child’s clothes or possessions are damaged or missing.
- Your child has unexplained bruises, cuts or scratches and doesn’t want to talk about it.
- Your child seems afraid of going to school, walking to and from school, riding the school bus or taking part in organized activities with peers.
- Your child is sad, moody, teary or depressed, appears anxious and/or suffers from low self-esteem, or acts in a way that isn’t usual for him or her.
Be responsive:
- Take the appropriate steps to intervene, contacting the school or location where the bullying is taking place.
- Make notes of whom you spoke with, what steps that person is doing to address the problem and when you will have a follow-up meeting.
If necessary, talk to your child’s guidance counselor or another professional to help your child recover from it.
If you need help or advice, call us at 937-498- 7261, or email us at help@newchoicesinc.org.
Did you Know?
New Choices has a variety of subject matter for grades K-12, that we are willing and prepared to bring to the schools/organizations, in order to educate the students on the National Issues of Domestic Violence, Teen Dating Violence, Stalking, as well as Bullying. Contact us to learn more.
Additional Resources
Sources Cited
1 https://www.stopbullying.gov/cyberbullying/what-is- it/index.html
2 https://www.stopbullying.gov/media/facts/index.html#stats — 28% of U.S. students in grades 6–12 experienced bullying. 20% of U.S. students in grades 9–12 experienced bullying.15
9% of students in grades 6–12 experienced cyberbullying.2
15% of high school students (grades 9–12) were electronically bullied in the past year.16
However, 55.2% of LGBT students experienced cyberbullying.17
3 https://newchoicesinc.org/help/B/safety
4 http://education.findlaw.com/student-conduct- and-discipline/specific- state-laws- against-bullying.html
5 http://criminal.findlaw.com/criminal-charges/cyber- bullying.html — Recently created cyber harassment statutes
may also provide an avenue for charging online bullies in some states. Nearly half of U.S. states include "cyberbullying" in their broader bullying laws (PDF), while most states also include either "cyberbullying" or "electronic harassment" as well. The nationwide trend is toward greater accountability for bullying in general, both in school and off campus, including criminal statutes.